A few years ago, I found myself super busy and super overwhelmed. I have a condition, you see, called AGH. When my AGH kicks in, I know it will be a matter of only a few short months before I begin to feel poorly. I start snapping at my family for no reason. I don't sleep well. I eat junk like it's going out of style. I don't check the oil in the old Jeep, forget to go grocery shopping, avoid my mother, let the kids eat way too many Ramen noodles, don't sift the cat box. Lovely.
My AGH is manageable, if I can manage to manage it, and could conceivably become a condition in lifetime remission. But my tendency is to deny its presence in my life, to not treat it with lifestyle changes. Like so many, I walked around for most of my life not realizing I had AGH. I didn't know the symptoms. All I knew was that I felt busier than most (or else I was a loser because I couldn't manage all my responsibilities). And from the symptoms' onset until I flipped my plate completely over and walked away from every unnecessary item on my TO DO LIST, I felt progressively worse--physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. The condition is cyclic. I volunteer, volunteer, volunteer, volunteer. And then I lose my mind. And then I flip my plate, thus, deleting every single item on my lengthy TO DO LIST. After I clear my schedule, I feel liberated and wonderful. These are typical signs of AGH, or Anti-Gravity Hand.
I raise my hand to volunteer for things on a regular basis. A couple years ago, when my son's Cub Scout den needed a den leader, my hand shot up. When our daughter and her husband needed a place to stay--oooo, stay here! When the church was short a Wednesday night teacher--I volunteered! When there weren't enough adults staying the whole week of camp--I packed my bags! And so on, until my daily TO DO LIST resembled War and Peace. At that point, I hit crisis mode and quit everything. I forsook commitments and disappointed people who counted on me.
Anti-Gravity Hand (AGH) is a very serious condition that, if left untreated, could cause damage in all areas of life. Because, when the kids ask me to play a board game, or my sister wants me to pop over for lunch, I have too much to do. I regularly forsake matters of the heart for things that don't matter, and that's terrible for a mother. So, for today, I pledge to under-commit to stuff that other people could do, and commit, instead, to the stuff only I can do.
I know this condition, I suffer from a severe form of it myself. The one thing that helped me was I read "The Seven Habits of Highly Successful People" By Steven Covey... I now own probably 4 copies fully noted with "Ah-ha" moments put on paper. The priorities exercise really made me think. I have reread that book until my first copy fell apart at the binding. It took me a while to get better and little by little I have made progress. I can completely and utterly sympathize with this and know I am there for you if you need a knowing friend!! I have some personal insights that address the why it happens and are more than willing to talk if you like. Take a deep breathe... Maybe we need a buddy system to work the program of AGH Anonymous, I could definately come up with the steps... Stay Strong and know you can only be the best you, you can be.. SMILE and HUGS!!
ReplyDeleteGreat post Paige. I had to back away from the AUGH myself. I had a dear friend who reminded me that my "yes" had to be "yes" and my "no" had to be "no" We are so conditioned that our importance in this society factors on how busy we are, no matter who suffers. I rather do one thing, and do it well, than a hundred things and crash and burn. Paige, you are in the right track. Love you. -L
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